THANKFUL FOR FAILURE

We went around the table after our tummies were full. It is Thanksgiving, and I’m at my sister’s table with her family. She and her husband, two grown daughters and three teenage grandsons are present. The tradition is to give thanks for something that starts with the first letter of the alphabet

The middle grandboy must start with the letter, “A”.

His brother does a mock cough and says that one is easy. Both of their girlfriends’ names start with the letter “A”. We make it around the table two times when I decide to throw in the word, “failure.” To my surprise, I’m not interrupted.

“I know this is strange, but I’m thankful for failure,” I said, hoping they would understand my explanation. Even the teenagers did not interrupt me.

I’m thankful for failures because they help guide me to what is truly important. Failed marriage, failed job, failed football game, a failed relationship… Our lists can go on and on.

I have been fascinated with paradoxes this year. “It is better to give than to receive.” “If you lose your life, you’ll find it.”

For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it. – Luke 9:24

Luke 9:24

I think I know what it finally means. We have all failed at something this year and all the ones before it. We have lost. We have loved, and we have grieved…..and amid all of it, we find life.

My precious breath is forever changing. I am getting older. I grieve for the lack of certain friend’s presence, but I have found joy in the memories.

I am grateful. I am thankful, and I am blessed.

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Oprah’s Book Club

I discovered a fascinating book, “Hidden Valley Road” by Robert Kolker. It is one of Oprah’s Book Club picks, which are on Instagram. https://www.instagram.com/oprahsbookclub/?hl=en

Out of a family of 12, there were 6 siblings who had schizophrenia. They lived on Hidden Valley Road in Colorado. As was the case with my mother, the severe symptoms and psychotic breaks occurred in their twenties.

There are still many mysteries surrounding this horrible illness; however, this book has opened some necessary doors.

It reads like a novel. Robert Kolker has done a wonderful job telling some horrific stories. I only wish he could tell mine.

For some reason, I feel I have found gold.

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